Making progress....

Once again I have to apologise for not updating my blog recently. Although I have been quiet on here things have been moving along with regards to our fundraising and I am very glad to be able to update you with two exciting pieces of news today!

The venue for our Imagine Appeal charity auction has been booked. It will take place on Friday 19th October at Fylde Rugby Club, Lytham St Annes. It is a truly lovely venue and has a capacity of 150 so we need to start selling tickets soon. All proceeds will go directly to the Alder Hey Imagine Appeal and I hope we can raise lots of money for them. The evening will consist of the auction, a raffle, food, live music, dancing and ultimately raising as much money as we can in memory of our precious little girl. Tickets will cost £10 per person.We continue to receive really generous donations of prizes and will continue to make requests for more over the coming months.

My second piece of news is that the Erin's Gift t-shirts are ready and on sale through the company who made them. They cost £10 each and proceeds will go to Ronald McDonald House Charities. I really love them and hope that you will too. There are four designs in total - two for women and two for men. Please take a look and consider buying one, not only to raise money for a wonderful cause, but also to help spread the word of what we do as Erin's Gift http://www.littleponypromotions.co.uk/

If you do buy a t-shirt I hope you will wear it and tell people about the work that we are doing in Erin's name. If possible please ask people to google Erin's Gift to take a look at my blog and also to follow me on twitter @ErinsGift. Thank you

It seems poignant to me these two important developments in our fundraising have occured over the last few days as two days ago marked 6 months since Erin passed away. This makes me feel so sad and I can't really believe that so much time has passed. I feel in many ways as though my life has stood still and been on pause since I lost my little girl. I am certainly not the same person I was before she died and my life is far from how I thought it would be now. I thought I would be spending my days watching little Erin grow, instead I spend them tweeting in her memory and trying to raise awareness of Turner Syndrome and the charities who helped us. These developments help me to realise that although it may feel like it at times, my life has not stopped. Erin was never given the chance to make the impact on the world that I know she could have done, but we are continuing to make things happen in her name. I am proud to say that Erin's Gift has now raised over £6500 for some amazing charities and it is still just the beginning.....

"There is no foot too small, that it cannot leave an imprint on this world"

- Unknown 

How things could have been....

I'm sorry I have not blogged for a while. I have been busy organising things for our auction which is taking place in October. We will be raising money for the wonderful Alder Hey Imagine Appeal - a charity close to our hearts. Erin was admitted to Alder Hey Children's Hospital when she was 1 day old and she spent the rest of her life in their kind and loving care. I am hoping that we can raise a lot of money for them. We should have the venue confirmed soon and continue to get amazing donations of prizes from twitter.

Often when I have been organising things since little Erin passed away, I am struck by how things could have been and the things that I should be organising in their place. This first occured when arranging Erin's funeral which took place on 12th December 2011. I spent hours and hours trying to find the perfect hymns, the perfect songs and the perfect readings. I felt like there were so many things that I was no longer going to be able to do for my most precious little girl that I had to make her funeral the best that is possibly could be. I poured all the love and pride that I felt for her as well as all the anguish and torment that I felt at her death into the planning of that day; all the time thinking that this was so wrong - that no one should have to plan their child's funeral. I couldn't help but think that I should be planning her christening instead - this was the normal thing for a new parent to do and was something that I had thought about when pregnant. Where would we hold it, who would do the food, what kind of outfit would Erin wear......I never got to make those decisions. Instead of organising a christening to celebrate the birth of my beautiful baby girl, here I was organising her funeral. It all felt very wrong and so very cruel.

I have been struck by similar thoughts whilst organising the auction. It is to take place in October, shortly before Erin's first birthday. I can't help but think that this is what I should be organising instead - a party to celebrate the first year of my gorgeous girl's life. Instead we will be raising money in her memory; money for a truly wonderful hospital who help thousands and thousands of children every year. I will always wish that we could be doing this fundraising with little Erin in our arms, but as we cannot we will do it proudly in her name - as ever inspired by her wonderful spirit, her amazing bravery and our immense pride at being her mummy and daddy.

Masato Fashion Show

As you are probably aware, we are organising an auction to raise money for the Alder Hey Imagine Appeal, to take place in October 2012. In order to collect items to sell I have been sending requests via twitter and have been overwhelmed by the response. We are in the process of setting up a website on which we have a page dedicated to all the generous businesses and individuals who have donated.

One person who got in touch was Mike who works with the fashion designer Masato. He had seen my tweets and said that Masato would like to donate one of his dresses for the auction. Needless to say I was totally gobsmacked and amazed. Mike said that my husband and I could attend their fashion show in Manchester to meet Masato and collect the dress. Well, I had never been to a fashion show before so was quite nervous, but yesterday we we went, we saw, we collected the dress and we had a lovely but emotional day.

We met Masato, Mike and some of their team at their hotel in the afternoon and despite being nervous, were put at ease by how lovely they were. Masato gave us this gorgeous dress and their photographer took some photos.

I am so excited that we are going to be able to auction it to raise money for Alder Hey -  it is a size 12 for those who may be interested!

We were also surprised by Helen and Joan, the lovely ladies from Latimer Couture jewellery (http://www.latimercouture.com/) . They explained that they would like to donate one of their beautiful necklaces to our auction - cue my first tears of the day. Unfortunately I don't think the photo below quite does justice to just how beautiful the necklace is, but hopefully I will be able to take some better ones before the auction.

We were then given VIP tickets to Masato's show which guaranteed us front row seats and a goodie bag. It was wonderful - the dresses were absolutely gorgeous and I would really recommend everyone to have a look at this wonderful designer's work (http://www.masato.co.uk/)

I am so grateful to Mike, Masato, Helen and Joan for their extremely generous donations to our auction. I am sure that they are going to raise a lot of money for the Alder Hey Imagine Appeal - a really wonderful charity. I would also like to thank them for being truly lovely to us and treating us to an amazing day out.


My husband and I arrived home that evening exhausted after an exciting but poignant day.It had been the first day since Erin was born that I got up, put makeup on and made an effort with my appearance. It had not felt right to do those things before, but yesterday it felt okay because it was all about Erin. All the fundraising we do is in her name, so going to Manchester and meeting these wonderful and generous people was for her. I hope I did her proud.

"How beautiful a day can be
When kindness touches it"
~ George Elliston

British Summer Time....

Well the clocks have changed to British Summer time, the sun is shining and it is a beautiful day. A beautiful day that makes me feel very sad. Sad because I want to be out enjoying the sunshine with my lovely little girl, but instead I am inside the house working on our fundraising plans. I do get little bits of joy and excitement from the fundraising - when a celebrity says they will donate an item to our auction or a new donation is made on our fundraising page it feels good for a second. But, then I remember why we are doing it and the fact that we are raising this money in memory of little Erin. I so wish we were raising it in celebration of her recovery from her heart operation and in celebration of her life.

Over the last week I have started making plans for our auction which will take place on October 20th. I don't really know what I am doing, having never done anything like this before - but hopefully it will come together okay. Yet again I have been overwhelmed by the support of people on twitter to help me with this. I have had numerous offers of items for the auction, which is wonderful. We are going to set up a website soon for Erin's Gift on which we can list all the items that will be included and the wonderful companies and individuals who donated them. I would also like to see if we can find a band/singer who would be willing to play and an auctioneer. The auction will be raising money for the Alder Hey Imagine Appeal. Alder Hey is the biggest children's hospital in Europe and they treat over 250,000 children a year. It really is a wonderful charity to support. I will keep the blog updated with the items for auction and how to get bid/get tickets for the event.

Meanwhile, my husband is well on the way with his training for the Manchester - Blackpool bike ride on 8th July, raising money for the Turner Syndrome Support Society. You can view the justgiving site for this here http://www.justgiving.com/ErinsGift. Alternatively you can sponsor the cyclists and support women with Turner Syndrome by texting ERIN61 followed by £(amount) to 70070.

Finally, our fundraising for Ronald McDonald House is ongoing and the justgiving page has reached  £6050 http://www.justgiving.com/Erin-Clancy. This is wonderful - it costs them £25 a night to support one family. The money we have raised in memory of Erin so far will pay to support a family for 242 nights, which is really great and will really make a difference. I have tried before, but it is so difficult to express quite how much this support means to a family when their child is seriously ill in hospital - it is invaluable! You can donate to support Ronald McDonald House by texting ERIN60 followed by £(amount) to 70070.

Once again I thank you all very much for your continued support of Erin's Gift - it means a lot to me.

"I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always.

As long as I'm living,

My baby you'll be"

- Robert Munsch

Fundraising Update

Today I thought it would be good to update you on the fundraising progress and plans we have in place so far and a reminder of the reasons why we are fundraising.

Ronald McDonald House
I am continuing my twitter campaign to raise awareness and hopefully funds for the wonderful work that Ronald McDonald House do. Yesterday we reached £5400 on the justgiving page which is just amazing and totally beyond what I ever could have imagined we would achieve http://www.justgiving.com/Erin-Clancy. This amount will help them provide accommodation and support to the family of a seriously ill child for 216 nights. This is 216 nights where a family somewhere who are going through one of the worst times of their lives will have one less thing to worry about - allowing them to focus more of their energy and strength on supporting their child to hopefully recover. I honestly can't understand why Ronald McDonald House are not better known - I have lost count of the number of parents who have contacted me on twitter to say they don't know how they would have coped without their support. Hopefully, through twitter, we as Erin's Gift have enabled a few more people to learn about their wonderful work.

The Turner Syndrome Support Society (TSSS)
We are in the initial stages of putting together an Erin's Gift team to complete the Manchester - Blackpool bike ride in July. So far we have about 12 confirmed riders and a few more possibles, which is amazing. All will be collecting sponsorship for the TSSS so hopefully we will be able to raise a lot of money for this very valuable cause. One of the scariest things upon learning of Erin's diagnosis of Turner Syndrome was realising that it seemed very unheard of. I found great comfort in knowing there was an organisation like the TSSS who would be able to provide support and friendship to both Erin and ourselves as her parents.

The Alder Hey Imagine Appeal
I have previously written in length about the brilliant care given to Erin by all the staff we encountered at Alder Hey Children's Hospital. At Erin's funeral donations made by family and friends were split between Ronald McDonald House and the Intensive Care Unit at Alder Hey. Now we are hoping to raise more money for them throughout 2012. Our first event is yet to be fully organised, but it is likely to take place in April and involves a generous local hairdresser who has agreed to do some haircuts in return for donations. Our second event is going to take place in October and is going to be a charity auction; this will be our biggest fundraiser of 2012. I am currently in the process of formulating a list of local and national businesses to write to for items, as well as celebrities and football teams. Already on the first day of planning a generous tweeter donated two amazing items to us. So far this event feels very daunting and scary to organise, but I am hoping that we have given ourselves enough time to make it a real success.

There are a number of other charities I am becoming aware of through twitter that I hope we will be able to fundraise for in the future as well. As always, I am inspired to do this by my beautiful daughter, Erin. The bravery and strength she showed throughout her life amazed me and I couldn't be prouder of her. The effort and time I put into fundraising in memory of Erin is my gift to her and the money and awareness we manage to raise is Erin's gift to those who need it.

Alder Hey

I think it is time for me to tell you about Alder Hey Children's Hospital and how wonderful the staff there were to us. As I explained in an earlier post, we spent time on two different wards - the first week on K2 and the next two weeks on the ICU. We came across nurses, doctors, surgeons, physios, secretaries, healthcare assistants, cleaners, anaesthetists, perfusionists and all were brilliant. In fact, I have nomintated them for a Tommy's award and rather than replicating my words, I thought I would copy the letter here:

"I would like to nominate the staff working on the intensive care unit at Alder Hey Childrens Hospital for the Miracle Unit Award.

My darling daughter, Erin, was born on 9.11.11 and transferred to Alder Hey when she was 1 day old. She had Turner Syndrome and was found to have a problem with her heart. On 16.11.11 she underwent heart surgery to fix this. Tragically, she suffered complications following her operation and was cared for in the ICU up until her death on 01.12.11. The staff who work on the ICU were incredibly kind and caring, not only to Erin, but also to myself and my husband.

Erin needed to be placed on an ECMO machine as her heart was very weak following the operation. This machine required attention 24 hours a day from a very dedicated team of staff. They had to monitor the flow of blood through it and take samples at regular intervals to check a number of things. It seemed very complicated and required a lot of attention, but the staff were never too busy to explain to us what they were doing and why it was necessary. We were amazed and extremely grateful for the dedication that they showed and the concentration and enthusiasm that they gave to their job.

Erin is our only child and we only had 22 days with her; we were never able to take her home. The staff on the ICU were so aware and considerate of this. Her medical needs meant that there was not much we were able to do for her ourselves, but they always ensured that when that was something for us to get involved in, we did. Therefore, I was able to assist with Erin's daily care needs and wipe her eyes and mouth and sometimes help change her nappies. They also understood my desire to breastfeed and supported and encouraged me to express milk throughout Erin's life. Being able to do these small things for my daughter was so important to me and I am so grateful that the staff realised this and encouraged me to help them. It demonstrated their empathy and understanding of my needs as a mummy.

Erin had to undergo many painful and unpleasant procedures during her short life, but the care with which these were carried out was plain to see. The staff on the ICU spoke so kindly to Erin and with such warmth when they were performing procedures, that it made leaving her in their care that little bit easier. Leaving my newborn baby was so difficult, but I always felt confident that she was being cared for by an extremely professional and caring group of people.

I can honestly say that we never came across one member of staff on the ICU who did not treat ourselves or our daughter with the upmost care and consideration. They encouraged us to get rest and look after our own needs as well as those of Erin. They also provided us with a room on the unit during the time when Erin was most medically unstable.

I will never be able to demonstrate to the staff on the ICU my full appreciation for the care they gave to little Erin. I am so amazed at the unwavering enthusiasm with which they approached their jobs even towards the end of what were very long shifts. At times they must find the work they do difficult, but they never let this show. They made what has been the most difficult and distressing time of our lives that little bit easier. There were even occasions during this awful time when we laughed and joked with the nursing staff - a true testiment to their humanity and kindness.

Finally, when Erin passed away they treated us with incredible care and compassion, enabling us to hold her as she died and cuddle her afterwards. Their kindness at this awful time will stay with me forever.

I wish more than anything that I could have had my darling Erin at home and in my care for the 22 days that she lived, but this was not possible. As she had to be in the care of others, there are no other team of people that I would have wished her to have been with. I truly think that the staff working on the ICU go above and beyond their job roles on a daily basis and truly deserve this award."

We will forever be grateful to them and will strive to show this appreciation through our fundraising. Therefore, The Alder Hey Imagine Appeal are one of the charities that we hope to support and raise money for through Erin's Gift. I hope that all sick children and their families receive the support that we did.